Posted by: thughesa | June 16, 2010

Just Say No…

Once your child reaches the age of two they start to change. They look more grown up, the sound more grown up, but they certainly do not act the part. Tantrums, falling to the floor arms flailing, throwing things, screaming, yelling. Your sweet little baby has suddenly turned into a little monster (sometimes) and it is hard to know what to do and how to deal with it.

I remember thinking how lucky I was, my daughter was two and a half and she had never had any kind of behaviour problems. I commented on this to a friend and low and behold, the next day she threw herself to the ground at the supermarket after I told her she could not have a new dolly. I was horrified and caught completely off guard, I didn’t even have an authoritative mommy voice yet, I was lost. I peeled her off the floor and threw her over my shoulder, screaming the entire way to the car.

I had thought I had jinxed myself, but it was only a matter of time. Learning to say NO to my child and my child learning to live with disappointment were two of the hardest lessons we had come across since learning to breastfeed. I did a little research, talked to some other moms and starting watching mothers with older children to see how they dealt with behaviour problems.

I learned quickly that if you say NO you have to stick to it. Those children I observed who had parents who gave in after saying NO initially seemed to have more trouble getting good behaviour in any situation and the children appeared to rule the roost.

It is hard saying to NO to your child. Sometimes we have had to drop all our groceries and leave a store or abandon a family outing due to a tantrum. But these instances have become been fewer and farther between as my daughter gets older. She has learned that when I say NO I mean it and I will follow through. I have felt like I was being mean at times, but now that I see the effects of my efforts I feel reassured that I made the right decision.

The truth is, you only have to do it once or twice. Once your child knows you will leave the playground or choose not to buy them the toy you promised them if they misbehave they figure out pretty quick not to push it once you have said NO.

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Responses

  1. “An authoritative mommy voice”….my husband calls mine “The Crazy Voice.” 🙂

  2. Hi LOL! Nice to see you.

    Ha, “Crazy Voice”, nice.

    I call it my “Momster Voice” these days!


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